Yesterday I got to go to another K12 get-together. Thank goodness for Tami and her family because she is always setting up these playdates and they are so good for me--oh yeah, and good for my boys too ;)
Yesterdays' playdate was the best one yet for me. Kelli, Tami and Summer were there, as well as Roxanne. This was my third time seeing Tami and Summer and my second for Kelli--first for Roxanne. And yesterday I felt like I was IN. I felt like I knew these girls a bit better and I felt like I got some real help and understanding from them.
And yesterday, I really needed it.
On the way to the park, the boys started complaining about doing K12. Up until now they've had a really good attitude about homseschooling so this really hit me out of left field. Apparently, the other day they were out riding bikes when Miss Crump, our schools' most popular teacher, was visiting a neighborhood friend. She saw the boys and waved the over. They know her and like all kids at the school, adore her, so they went to talk to her.
She asked which one was Charlie because she was so excited to have Charlie in her class next year. Charlie felt proud that she said she couldn't wait to have him and so he felt sad to tell her "We're going to be homeschooled this year."
"What?? But I want you in my class!" was Miss Crumps' reply.
And so then Charlie, and Xander by extension, are feeling sad about home school. And so was I. Big Time.
When we arrived at the park, I told the other ladies what had happened and they all comforted me. They've been there. Their kids have been there. They admitted, maybe it won't work out. But won't be so glad we tried? And for them, it's all been worth it and their kids all prefer K12.
It just felt so good to be understood. I didn't even tell them about the lunch out with neighbor friends the other day in which they all looked at me like I was a total freak. We went around the table telling our latest news and part of my news was that I was getting ready for school. And the table just fell into dumbfounded silence. No one knew what to say. And so we just moved on. I felt like I was completely alone.
Have you ever felt that way? If you're a homeschooling mom, or if you're thinking of becoming one, I bet you have. How could you not? I think only another homeschooling mom would understand. But that's a post for another day.
For today I wanted to talk about why I continue to feel like I am doing the right thing by keeping my boys home this year.
Oh it would be so easy to send them back to school! They've got great teacher assignments this year and they've got lots of friends and besides, our school is right across the street. How much easier could it get?
But that would be a cop out. I know it in my gut. It's not right for me. There are no guarantees of course. I have no real way of knowing whether homeschooling will be right for us either, but it's something I've got to try.
At the end of my days, I may regret never trying to homeschool my boys when I've had so many feelings that have told me I should do it. However, I'm quite certain I'll never regret trying. Trying will tell me if it's right or not. Trying will teach me so much about myself and my boys. Somewhere deep down, trying will let my boys know that I love them and I'm well, willing to TRY ... for their sake. I choose to try and to have no regrets.